Sam’s athletically trim body was trembling all over with the crazed excitement of anticipation. He was desperately and passionately in love for, just above his shelter, which was the wheelbarrow in the garden shed, was his paramour, hanging on a beautiful big web. She was gorgeously huge, fat and sleek, and black, very black. Everything about her excited him. He spun his message out by text, because he no longer had the ability to lie. He could not deny his obsessed love for her, so he climbed up on to the edge of her silken web and plucked his message out in spider text. “I love you; I will be yours, yours only, from today and forevermore!”
Sam’s delicate arms strummed the geometric threads of her web musically, just like the troubadours of old when they serenaded a lady’s beauty with their guitars; and in poetry most prosaic, he declared his eternal love for her and his desire to sire a dynasty of the most superior descendants. With her, of course, his paramour, no other would do, no other was as obviously fertile as she was, or as ready.
A little while later, the sultry black seductress tinkered the strings of her web. The enticing message vibrated all the way through Sam, thrilling him; he was beside himself.
“What is your name my glossy black Gorgeous?” he strummed back to her on the wires. A little while later the reply came, “My name is Delilah, you handsome one!”
That was all Sam needed. He was ready! Slowly and carefully, he made his way up the sticky interlocking threads of her ladyship’s web to the arms of his beloved One and Only’, the one of his dreams.
He approached, made some advances, retreated, then teased her a bit with his thin and delicate arms, “Yes,” he gauged her reaction, “Yes, she really wanted him!”
Sam embraced her, she was a whopping big girl, huge in fact, but he had what it took, and after a few seconds of tussle, he had fathered a dynasty of spiders. He was euphoric. Now he would forever leave his mark on the world of arachnids!
Then Delilah grabbed him in a tight hug, and she whispered to him, “You are the soul of my children, their food, their sustenance, they will be nourished by your mind and your body”.
Then she bent down and nipped him gently. He tasted nice; she wouldn’t get indigestion from this, her latest lover!