A paraprosdokian is a figure of speech in which the latter part of a sentence or phrase is unexpected and often humorous. A somewhat related word is lexophilia, which means a form of addiction describing those who are obsessively enamoured of words, especially those set in a new framework. Lexophiles tend to like paraprosdokians.
Submitted by Brian McLean
- You do not need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute to skydive twice.
- I didn't say it was your fault. I said I was blaming you.
- To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research.
- Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.
- War does not determine who is right, only who is left.
- Where there's a will, I want to be in it.
- The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it's still on my list.
- Since light travels faster than sound, some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
- If I agreed with you, we'd both be wrong.
- We never really grow up, we only learn how to act in public.
Submitted by Jan Bauer
- A recent study has found that women who carry a little extra weight, live longer than the men who mention it.
- You know that tingly feeling you get when you're attracted to someone? That's your common sense leaving your body.
- I think my neighbour is stalking me as she's been googling my name on her computer. I saw it through my telescope last night.
- Relationships are a lot like algebra. Have you ever looked at your X and wondered Y?
- Today a man knocked on my door and asked for a small donation toward the local swimming pool. I gave him a glass of water.
- If I had a dollar for every girl that found me unattractive, they would eventually find me attractive.
Submitted by John Baird and Terry Ball
- I hate when a couple argues in public, and I missed the beginning and don't know whose side I'm on.
- It's the start of a brand new day, and I'm off like a herd of turtles.
- If you're sitting in public and a stranger takes the seat next to you, just stare straight ahead and say, "did you bring the money?"
- The older I get, the earlier it gets late.
- I had my patience tested. I’m negative.
Submitted by Graeme Russell
- No matter how much you push the envelope, it'll still be stationery.